Whether Elizabeth's spies knew about the letter
is still a matter of much conjecture.
Where's she been hiding?
She's not dead, Julian.
The good ones never are.
It's just a costume.
They're making a documentary - History's Greatest Plots.
Apparently, there was a coup planned here back in the day.
Hey, look, that wasn't a coup, per se.
That was an informal discussion
with some parliamentary colleagues
about Maggie's leadership style.
- You know? - She's not talking about the '80s, mate.
- Look at her! - What plot she talk abutt? About?
Dunno. That's just what they told us. I thought you might know.
Elizabeth's forces simply happened upon the plotters...
One for the bloopers!
..Elizabeth's forces simply happened upon the plotters...
- Do you know, I don't think I've ever seen you laugh. - Yeah.
I asked the producer if they'll name-check the house
and he just stared at me blankly, so...
That's the producer over there, Mike.
Oh. Well, then I asked some guy.
Er, do you mind? Some of us are trying to learn something here.
..Regarded by many as a martyr, a mastermind,
a hero, and perhaps the most important person ever
to have walked these grounds.
Is it me? Sounds like me.
Which is why the history books echo with the name
Sir Humphrey Bone.
Heavens! Why, I think she means...
Oh, it's fallen off again!
- Humphrey? - Where is he?
It's just such an incredible place.
You can almost hear the history echo from the walls.
Yeah, it's almost like...
..It doesn't shut up!
And there's a Stuart facade,
and the Dutch gable, and the...
High-end B&B? In the gatehouse,
opens next spring. Tell your friends. We could probably
- do a discount... - We're really, really lucky
to have found - well, been given - this place.
Actually, we did wonder if you'd be up for talking about
your family connection to the house on camera.
I-I-I-I... I've never been on camera.
Well, have a think about it.
Yeah. She'll think about it.
Are you mad?
- Context? - The interview.
To make the gatehouse a guest house, we need ghosts. Guests.
- And this is free publicity, so... - No, forget it.
- I'm not going on telly. - Why? What are you so scared of?
Going on telly!
- Oh, you'd be great. - No!
The camera would love you.
Just tell your story, name-drop the house, and...
..Oh, you could wear a top with our logo on it.
We don't have a top with our logo on it.
Hmm. We don't have a logo.
Hmm. I'll call Obi. He'll do us a quick logo.
Bad moonah on the rise.
Dust cover sun.
Birds fall. Crop fail.
Something wicked this way come.
- Oh, that explain it. - Anybody home?
- I was hoping I'd catch you. - Humphrey?
- Humphrey! - Head bit?
- Humphrey? - I'm just saying, personally speaking,
I can't remember ever seeing you properly laugh.
That's absolute nonsense. I laugh all the time.
Why, only the other evening, Fanny and I were in stitches
while recalling the satirical skewering
of socio-political institutions in The Mikado.
Isn't that right, Fanny? The Mikado?
Oh, hilarious skewering of socio-political institutions.
- Hysterical. - Side-splitting.
- Riotous. - Agreed.
I concur. So I hope that puts this matter to rest. Carry on.
- Humphrey! - Head?
Neither of you laugh!
- Him! - Him, sorry.
- You didn't tell us you were famous. - Am I? Ooh, that's nice.
Am I a painter?
She means the plot, mate. The Catholic plot.
You always said your death was just a misunderstanding.
Well, in a way, yeah.
Certainly wasn't, erm... straightforward.
What, one chop?
Well, it sounds pretty straightforward to me,
but then I was burned alive, so...
All right, now, steady on, Mary. Steady. Steady.
- Well... - I mean more that the circumstances were...
I could tell you about it if you like.
Well, if you wouldn't mind.
- That would be wonderful, yes. - We've got all day.
Yum! Yum, yum, yum, yum!
Ooh, thank you.
Did you sleep well? Er, dormir...bon?
Cos it gets quite draughty down your end of the, um...
Do you want a bit of brekkie? Boeuf? Bit of brekkie, Sophie?
Oh, la la.
Qu'est ce qu'il veut maintenant?
Erm, I was just wondering if there might be
something you might fancy doing.
Not with me. Not with me.
No, erm, I meant more for you.
- Like a hobby. - Oh, c'est insupportable.
Something that might make you a bit more...
Uh, tapestry? Maybe?
Or you could learn some English?
Or there's archery,